


Fuck Love

by QueenofRhymes



Category: Ultimate Spider-Man (Cartoon)
Genre: Adult Content, Adultery, M/M, PeterxSam, Spideynova - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2018-07-09
Packaged: 2018-10-02 18:19:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10224215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenofRhymes/pseuds/QueenofRhymes
Summary: Sam and Peter had been friends before but their relationship ended on bad terms. Now years later their paths cross again. Sam is going to become Peter's assistant, but the younger man does not seem to remember that Peter was his friend. Exactly what is going in here? How much did their lives change? Can their friendship be salvaged or will their relationship take a turn for toxic and destructive tendencies once more?





	1. Finding You?

Peter was walking back to his office. He had just bought lunch from his favourite Mexican restaurant which was conveniently right next to his office building. The man was just about to have a taste from one of the dishes when he stopped dead in his tracks. On a nearby bench was sitting none other than Sam Alexander. Peter mentally counted how old his childhood crush was supposed to be....It was either twenty-three or twenty-four. However, there was no way for Peter to be certain. He sighed. He wanted to go up to Sam and converse with his former friend. Alas, the way they had split was not what one would call a favourable ending to what was supposed to be a lifelong friendship.    
         He seems troubled. The fact that Sam was upset was obvious, judging by his hunched shoulders and his downcast head. He soon brought his hands to his forehead and rested the weight of his world on them. Peter felt disconcerted. He definitely did not like what he was seeing. His lunch break was going to end soon, however. This was why he simply sighed and walked away exactly like he had done before.    
         Sam did not know what he was going to do. He had got fired again and for the same reason – uncooperative, hard to deal and work with. Just because he was not a submissive prick that only wanted to kiss up some jerk's ass. He could not receive a recommendation, however. It was certainly going to be difficult for him to get hired in the same industry in this city.    
        Sam groaned. He had been working in IT ever since he graduated from high school. Even before that he had been "working" in it, although it had not exactly been legal. In spite of his knowledge, capabilities and experience Sam was certain that it was going to be hard to find a similar job to the one he had previously been at. The town was relatively small and he had already become notorious for his tendency to "blow up and turn against his boss." Of course, all of his previous employers forgot to mention exactly why he did what he did. Asking him to help hide their wrongdoing and possibly turn him into a scapegoat was something that had definitely been against.    
        Peter left a minute or two before Sam lifted his head to take in the scenery. The glass-like building of Buzlyankov, Norman and Studs was in front of him – the best and possibly only well-known law firm in this god-forsaken town. Unfortunately, they were not looking for any new additions to their IT team. They were, however, seeking to hire an assistant for one of their newly appointed partners. Sam did not think twice about walking into the company and leaving his CV in the HR department. Needless to say, he was more than pleased and hopeful when he was contacted by a member of said department three days later on a particularly shitty Friday in order to schedule an interview on Monday.    
   
      When Peter saw exactly who was part of the candidates for the opening of the position for his personal assistant he nearly did a double-take. He desperately rubbed his eyes, but sadly he was not dreaming. He sighed. There was no turning back. If Sam managed to impress the other partners and the board of directors there was nothing Peter could do or say against the boy...no man in order to prevent the company from hiring him.    
   
       To say that Peter was sweating from nervousness and anxiousness would be an understatement. He was literally shaking under the desk. Sam was brilliant. He was charming, his smile was disarming, his sense of humour possessed just the right touch of sarcasm and bitterness that had often accompanied it years go. His gaze was sharp and intense. Those demanded to be met but not for a confrontation. They demanded acknowledgment. He won them over. He could tell. Sam had always been good at attracting positive attention to himself. It seemed that he was still quite capable of evading the questions and not raising too much suspicion.    
        The only thing he shared was that he had been fired from his last job because there had been disagreements between him and the seniors. His qualifications were above what was mandatory for a personal assistant. Peter was aware of it. So were the other partners. The only question which was left unanswered mainly because no one dared to ask was why such a person was applying for a position that would be so mediocre to him.    
         Once the interview was finished Peter offered to escort Sam to the exit. He was certain that Sam did not remember him. The time they had met Peter's appearance had been completely different – he had been overweight, worn glasses, dyed his hair a horrid orange-ish colour and because of his over-sized glasses he was sure that Sam had never managed to memorize his features well enough to recognize even after such a drastic change. As for his name, Sam only knew him by his nickname – P2. Sam had thought that Peter was called that way because of the teen's love for math not because of his intricate family and given name.    
              "Thank you for giving me your undivided attention. However, I would not want to inconvenience you any further by taking up more of your time." Sam uttered. Peter simply blinked and shook his head.   
              "It's no problem. It is my duty to shower my future assistant with attention. After all, we may have selected you and to put it bluntly, liked you. However, I fear there is no way I can be certain whether you would take us up on our offer." Peter explained.    
          Sam's eyes widened. He grinned, Peter's eyes narrowed.    
              "Wait... you mean to tell me I got the job?" Sam questioned then before he allowed excitement to overtake him the man recollected himself and asked suspiciously, “ Wait...you aren't authorized to tell me this, are you? Plus, I don't exactly have any experience. There were a lot of other people who seemed more suitable....”    
           Peter put up his hand and asked, “Mr. Alexander, are you trying to convince me to hand the job to someone else? Because believe me I can do that in the blink of an eye.''   
           Sam's eyes widened once more before he fearfully shook his head. Peter internally chuckled.    
                “ Um...Mr. Parker, I have a couple of questions – could you please address me by my first name and when exactly do I start?”    
                 “Yes, I can certainly use your given name and you will be starting next week. I still need to handle a few things before you can get started.” Peter answered before he smiled.   
Recognize me. Come on...You always said you adored my smile because of its genuine nature.   
         Alas, it seemed as though Sam had completely erased Peter from his life. The younger man only nodded, reciprocated the polite smile and shook hands with his future boss before exiting the building. Peter watched him go before he made a mental promise to himself to find out exactly what had happened to make Sam turn out the way he was. Internally Peter wondered whether the younger man would be interested and would care enough to enquire as to what had happened in Peter's life to alter his personality and appearance so much.


	2. So it begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> things start going forward. Sam's first day is interesting to say the least

“Hello my name is Sam Alexander and I am going to be Mr.Parker’s new assistant as of today. I realize my background is not exactly what one would expect for a person pursuing such a career and I do realise I have a lot to learn. I am honored to be here today and will o my best to listen to you and will hopefully become a positive addition to the team.” Sam stated, smiling brightly at everyone in the room. 

The interns loved him. The current assistant as well both junior and senior staff members of said team. Peter could not have been happier. Sam was learning quickly. It was quite funny to watch him have to begrudgingly follow current documentation and steps on how certain tasks could be completed, Peter was certain the other man had already figured out different, faster and more efficient ways on how to perform said tasks. Alas this was not a tech company where the goal was to do things as fast and as most straightforward as possible. 

This was a law firm and there were regulations to follow. Plus Peter was not certain whether everyone would be able to understand Sam’s tech gibberish. He remembered how difficult it used to be for him back in the days and they were teenagers and Sam knew only a fraction of what he did today. 

“Would you like to grab lunch together?” A red-headed intern asked Sam twirling a lock of hair between her fingers. 

Peter was bewildered when Sam politely declined and continued listening to Mark, the assistant manager, rattle on about the daily activities that Sam had to perform and what were the ways to retrieve and record information in regards to Peter’s daily routines and how to go through some of the most basic documents. Sam was picking up stuff quite fast, but still there were terms he had to write down and learn later. 

Soon lunch hour came and Mark went off to meet with the other assistants and asked Sam to come along. Strangely the boy declined politely once more. 

“I would rather stay here and go over some of the things we’ve discussed so far. Thanks for the invite. I’ll come tomorrow if it would not be too much trouble.” Sam said.

Mark chuckled, “No worries. I understand all of this may be slightly confusing at times. Take all the time you need and if anything is ever needed my office is just around the corner, you can come and ask anytime.”

“Thank you.” Sam replied as he and Mark shook hands and bid each other goodbyes. 

Peter watched curiously as Sam immdeiately sat down and opened up his laptop. Peter was curious. Sam stated he would be going over his notes and what they’d discussed with Mark. Right now though the young man seemed to be doing something else. Peter decided to go in and investigate and indeed his hunch had been correct. He could see strange symbols (possibly commands running on the screen) and Sam’s humming voice could be heard. 

He used to do it before whenever he was looking through how a piece of software had been constructed and was seeing how it had been designed to work. Peter’s eyes widened. This was a piece of software specifically designed for the partners of Buzlyankov, Norman and Studs. It was the encrypted data of some of their most important clients. Only their sysadmins had access to this. 

“Sam, mind telling me what you’re doing at the moment? You do know reverse engineering is never part of your daily routines. Nor should our clients’ information be of any importance to you.” Peter begrudgingly scolded. 

Sam’s head snapped up and he quickly closed all the windows he’d had displayed on before.  
“ Sorry.” Sam mumbled.” It’s just a lot of the things Mark showed me how to do…”

“Sam, I am sure you can find ways to perform them 10x faster after you’ve seen how the program works and all but this is not part of you job. You’re not part of our dev team or tech team in general. You’re my personal assistant and part of your job description is to simply follow regulations.” 

Sam’s eyes darkened. He obviously missed his old job. Perter wished he could help him, but judging form the information he’d gathered recently the predicaments the man had had to deal with because of his previous boss had stripped him of parts of the trust he’d built up in the tech community. He’d done a lot of unethical hacking for his boss for what reason Peter did not know. He just knew it would be difficult for Sam to be able to work in the same industry in the small town they lived in again. 

Peter knelt down so that he could be eye level with Sam and stated, “I don’t know what’s happened to you and I know where your true passion lies, but stick with this and lay low for a while and I’ll see what can be done so that you can become part of our security experts and help us keep our client’s info secure and work as best as we can someday. How does that sound?”

Sam perked up at that and then his eyes narrowed, “ Thank you, Peter. I really am grateful but I would need to know why are you doing this? You could’ve fired me right away.”

Peter contemplated how to answer it for a while and then smiled, “Mistakes happen, don’t worry too much about it. Learn form them and you’ll grow. I’d be a shitty boss if I fired you right away for something as minor as looking through source code.” 

“Haha, I’ve not gone far. I’ll give you that.”  
“And you’d better not go any further than that in the near future.” Peter reprimanded Sam for one final time before insisting that Sam spend his lunch break with him. 

Sam protested, but was soon compelled to come by Peter’s disarming smile and friendly insistence. Plus, he did owe the guy for keeping things between the two of them only.  
Needless to say, a lot of people were baffled to see their lone wolf Peter Parker take his new personal assistant to lunch. Little did anyone know that Peter had very good reasons for taking Sam out to a secluded place and a plan which was about to be launched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the late update, guys. I've been busy as hell. hope you liked the filler. more to come soon.Buzlyankov, Norman and Studs


	3. Remember Me?

“Mind telling me why you’d take your assistant with you to lunch? Don’t you normally dine with the other lawyers?” Sam asked as he and Peter sat on the small, secluded table at the corner. The place was small and had basic meals. It partially reminded Sam of a place you’d take people you did not want to be seen in public with. 

“That question is an excellent one, Sam.” Peter began as his eyes scanned the menu. He smiled and looked up, resting the menu on the side of the table. Sam’s eyes followed his hands and then moved up with them to meet the other’s piercing gaze, “ I normally eat alone at the office doing work, but today I needed to check something. See if I was right if you will about a hunch I’ve had ever since I saw you for the first time in a while.”

Peter’s gaze was smoldering. He could see pain in those blue eyes as Sam’s confusion raged on. Green met blue as Peter sighed and whispered in a such a sorrowful voice it made Sam’s inner muscles clench in guilt even though he did not know what exactly he was feeling guilty over. 

“You don’t remember me, do you…Sam? Or should I say bucket-head?” Peter said, chuckling when Sam’s eyes widened when the familiar nickname rolled off Peter’s tongue. 

Sam swallowed before he responded, “H-how do you know about that? I’ve had only a couple of people call me that… It was even back in high school and I don’t…”

“It actually derives from an accident with an ice bucket in seventh grade - a year before high school. It was summer you wanted to play a joke on me by pouring ice water on me since I’d complained all day it was super hot and I was already sweating profusely. Your plan backfired though since Luke warned me and I got to dump the substance all over you. You and I then started messing around with each other and you ended up pushing me and I fell on a corner of the house and got tangled in a web…a lot of it. Hence the nicknames - bucket or bucket-head and webs and web-head.” Peter recited off a script, but there was no place from which he’d be reading that perfect memory except his brain.

Sam swallowed thickly. He felt a lump at his throat. He’d called his best friend like that. P2…He could not remember much about those years… Hell he was lucky he remember his sister and mother after the car crash and coma he’d been induced to. He’d forgotten everything and everyone… It had taken a lot of pictures, videos and patience for Sam to start recalling even remotely his family and closest friends. Where had Peter been then? 

“I got in an accident… a car accident which left me in a coma. I was..I was sixteen.” Sam said as he started playing with the button of his shirt. He abhorred recalling that story. It made him feel handicapped. His long-term memory had been damaged since then and he’d lost a decent portion of his life he’d never get back. 

“I’ve had issues with my memory, I- I forget, Pete. I’ve forgotten my memories from that time. I only barely recall Kaithlyn and my mom from when I was about ten give or take one or two years…I’ve tried therapy and medication. The efforts of all those professionals were fruitless.” Sam elaborated as he sucked in a breath and asked, “Who…were you p2? I know that you were older - you and Luke - you guys were going to graduate about a year after I and Ava enrolled into high school. Danny was going to stick around for a while after that before he went to college as well.” 

“That I was and still am, Sam.” Peter answered as his gaze faltered and came back pained once more, only this time the dismal look was from a different reason. He was confused as he enquired, “Why didn’t anyone ever tell me? I came back to visit.”

Sam chuckled humorlessly, “I told them not to.” 

Peter frowned as he balled his fists, “Mind telling me why you deprived me of seeing my best friend who was hurt and needed my help.” 

Sam felt his eyes start watering, “Because I did not want anyone to see me like that. Plus….I, I felt something then, Pete…I-I felt something which I should not have ever felt for you.” 

Peter was left flabbergasted at Sam’s confession. His eyes widened before he said, “I..I don’t know what to say to that.” 

Sam laughed, “Always the gentleman…There is nothing to say about it, Pete. I got better. I’m fine now. Plus you’ve changed a lot. I take it whoever is with you now is a lucky woman.” 

Peter could not sense any anger or jealousy laced in Sam’s voice. His friend had truly forgotten him and right now Peter felt it was not so much due to the accident than Sam’s own choice. How much had his departure and rejection hurt Sam?

“I am…I’m with MJ still.” Peter started watching a surprised yet genuine smile grace Sam’s face.

“That’s incredible. Weren’t you guys dating back when you were like 16 or 17?” Sam questioned. 

Peter nodded, feeling a pit start to open up in his stomach. No one really did know what exactly encompassed his relationship with MJ now and the fact that it was nothing that it had been before. 

“And you’re still with her?” That’s what - 9 years?” Sam asked unable to believe it. He’d watched it happen in movies but never knew he’d witness it in real life. True love really did conquer all. He was happy for them. Truly was. 

“We broke it off a couple of times during college. You know distance and all that and then met up after we graduated. She was a journalist in San Francisco and I was an intern at one of the law firms there. We then hit it off again and after that got married and moved here. Her boss made her head of their branch here and I moved with her.” Peter told the freshly concocted lie of the beautiful story of his life the way he’d got used to telling and naturally swept Sam long with it as he always did with everyone. He despised the fact that he had to lie and wondered when it would end exactly.

“I did notice the ring. A late congratulations are in order I presume.” Sam said and was soon cut off of that he was about to say by the waiter coming by:

“I am so sorry for taking so long, boys. I had to help my dad at the kitchen. So what can I get you?” The brunette asked. Her brilliant eyes scanned Sam before she exclaimed, “Sam?! Is this really you? And..and Peter?” 

The two men smiled - Sam was astonished to see Ava once more, he hadn’t seen her since she left for New York. She’d come to visit him when he was in the hospital once but had not been made aware of how much the accident had cost Sam. He did not want her to feel guilty after all. 

Hugs were exchanged and exclamations of how much everyone had changed encompassed the corner. Sam learnt Ava’s mother had fallen ill and therefore Ava had had come home and help out in the small restaurant her family ran. Sam and Peter wished her mother well and invited her to eat with them but she declined stating her shift had just started and she had a lot of work to do. 

After the two ordered Ava left them and went to get their drinks. Sam sighed as he looked at Peter, “I honestly don’t know what to say.” 

Peter laughed, “I don’t know what to say either, Sam. I honestly thought you were pretending not to know me, but now after what you told me, I’m not surprised. I was way different back then.” 

“Yeah… We all were.” Sam finished and drank of the glass of water Ava came by and dropped off hopping off back to the kitchen.

“Sam I’m really sorry for…” Peter began but Sam motioned with his hand to forget about the past. Once he’d finished extinguishing the contents of the glass he set it down and breathed in before he looked at Peter and said, “The damage’s been done, Pete. We were.. Honestly we were kids back then. We did not know any better. Mostly me. You had your girlfriend and I had this misconfigured hero worship for you. You were like a brother to me and I honestly wish we could just try and be friends again. Let’s just forget about the past. I know I’m better at it than you but still I’d appreciate the effort on your part.”

Peter chuckled at Sam’s sense of humour and smiled noticing it shined through the darkness that his life had been swept into. 

“I’d be honored to be your friend again, Sam.” Peter said and smiled when Sam nodded. 

Their dishes soon came and the two started eating talking about trivial matters - some were work related others not and just enjoyed the other’s company. 

“I have to ask… How long have you two been married?” Sam questioned as he looked Peter’s face scrunch up for a while before he answered:

“I’d say we’ve been married for 3 years and a half now. Lexie will be turning one year soon in March.” 

“Wait.. you have a kid as well? Damn you’re old, Pete.” Sam chuckled nudging the man’s shoulder. Peter glared at him before replying, “ I am 4 years your senior, Sam. It would be strange if  
I was married to MJ for so long and have not had a kid come along the way given the fact that we both adored the idea of having a child and raising it ever since we were little. She more than me but still.” 

“Yeah..she was your best friend since you were in diapers. I remember vaguely - she had red hair right?” Sam tried to recall more lucid images, but almost all of them were fuzzy.

Peter nodded, but changed the subject back to their daily tasks, wishing to leave his wife at the darkest recesses of his mind. She was probably somewhere dark anyways, possibly fucking her business partner at the moment. Who knew? Certainly no one but the three of them and Peter was intent on keeping it that way. For Lexie’s sake at least. 

The rest of the day at the office was spent in a normal and boring pace. Sam was getting the hang of some of the basic tasks he had to perform and Peter managed to get a good amount of progress made on one of the trickier cases handed to him. He had become a partner quite recently ergo he had a lot to prove and Peter was intent on giving 100% on absolutely everything he did.


	4. Our past and present

“Hi, mom.” Sam said to the picture he had left on the table in the corner of his living room. He hadn’t talked to her in 3 years. He sighed. He went to pick the phone and dialed her number only to sigh once more as the ringing went into voicemail.  
“H-hey, mom. It’s Sam. Again. Tell Kaelynn that I miss her and I’m thinking about her, okay? I miss you too, mom. I’m hoping you two are doing alright. You know if you ever need anything I’ll be right there. I’ll come right away. Stay safe and I l-love you guys. Both of you, you hear me?” He finished as the voicemail finished recording his hundredth message. He should’ve known things would happen this way. He’d left them and they had tried to reach out to him numerous times, but he ignored them all, partially because it was easier and partially because if something were to happen to him and he’d got thrown into jail he did not want to drag them with him. 

Peter’s voice suddenly came back into his mind. He was married. Sam recited those three words over and over again. How could things have gone so terribly wrong in his life, he wondered. He wished he could turn back time and tell himself not to fall for his best friend, not to get into that car and to act differently. Perhaps he could still be a role model for his little sister, show her that not all men in her life were lousy and deceptive assholes that would just up and leave when you needed them the most. Unfortunately, he could not turn back time. With a sigh on his lips once more he turned on his side and tried to get some sleep. 

________________________________________________________________________________________

“MJ?” Peter called as he entered the apartment the two owned and lived in. He could not hear Lexie’s crying. Perhaps she was still with the nanny. Peter called MJ’s name once more, but no answer came. Perhaps she was still busy with whatever or whomever she was doing. He could not have been more wrong. 

“Peter!” MJ screamed as he went into their shared bedroom. He almost regurgitated on the spot. Had she no mercy, he thought as he watched one naked body leave the room and the other remain where it was.   
“Really, love?” He used the nickname for her, filling it with all the pain she’d piled upon him with her constant acts of adultery.   
“Really, tiger. When will you finally give up and set me free?” She answered as her eyes met his. He’d never thought he’d hate her as much as he did in that moment. She’d never gone as far as do it in front of him or let herself get caught willingly.   
“I believe we’ve already discussed it.” He tried to reason with her. Sadly, MJ was done with him. Her patience was wearing thin. She scoffed as she picked up her clothes and put them on. Her red hair was a mess and Peter wished their lives were as easy to fix as her appearance was. 

“Things are not working, Pete, and you know it.” She tried to reason with him, make him see things from her end. “Lexie is still a baby yes, but why pretend we’re together? Is this the kind of family you want her to grow up to be part of - a broken home where her parents would rather kill each other than remain in the same room as the other?” 

Peter glared at her as he threw her a towel and told her to go and take a shower since she reeked of sex. MJ only rolled her eyes as she took the towel and disappeared into the bathroom. Peter opened both windows and breathed in the fresh air. He wished he could just jump through the open window and forget about his troubles. It was true MJ wanted divorce and he did not since that would mean to have Lexie grow up without a stable family. They were going to leave one another only when Lexie was ready.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

“Hi, Sam, how are you today?” Asked one of the junior assistants, Julie, was her name. She twirled a golden curl between her fingers and smiled coyly at Sam. He internally groaned once he saw that she was unabashedly flirting with him. Perhaps she wished to have a fling with him, who knew? Julie was a flirt and she was known for quickies with a lot of office mates, Martin had warned him so. He’d said if Sam wished he could have a go with her, but he’d better not fall for her, nor expect anything more than a couple of quick fucks to happen. 

Sam laughed on the inside. If only either Julie, or Martin knew that Sam held no interest for Julie, nor any member of the opposite for that matter. He sighed as he grabbed her hand and took her to a more secluded spot. 

“Oh going straight to the point I see. My, my, Sam, I never would’ve piqued you for such a womanizer.” She chuckled at her own joke. Sam simply rolled his eyes.   
“Knock it off, Julie.” He replied sternly grabbing both of her hands and bringing them back to her sides when she’d started rubbing his shoulders in a fashion that was far too blunt and straightforward for Sam’s taste.

She pouted but smirked and tried once more, her breath hot on his ear, “Are you sure about that, Sam?” She smirked as she panted,”You’e got me so worked up already.”  
“Oh God..Can’t you take no for an answer?” Sam responded as he backed away from her.   
She looked at him confused. She crossed her arms and her brown eyes looked menacingly at him, “I understand why married or taken men beg me to stop, but you single fellas almost always wish to have a go with me, especially the new guys. Why would you decline my pleasant offer?”   
She tried to be sweet, but the glare she was shooting Sam made him scoff. He decided to end things where they were even if that meant having rumors fly around. 

“Because vaginas don’t get me going, Julie. Plus even if they did, I have dignity and so should you. Throwing yourself at every bloke who crosses your path at a bar is one thing but at the office is a whole different story.”

Julie was taken aback for a moment and Sam only sighed before he left her there. Her skirt needed to be adjusted along with her eyes that had small tears in them. Really, he did not know what demons she was fighting, but sleeping with everyone and anyone was not going to help her battle them. He’d tried one night stands too. They left you even emptier in the morning than you felt at the night before anything had even started yet. 

“Sam?” Peter called, his tone held a little anger in it.”Would you come to my office, I have something urgent I need to discuss with you?”

Sam nodded, curiosity burning his insides. As far as he’d remembered they’d discussed everything in the morning meeting when all the important matters were talked out between the different divisions and all the partners told their assistants what needed to be done today and what could wait until better days. Sam was wondering about whether he’d made a mistake, when what Peter said to him made his blood run cold.  
“Sam, I am aware that your personal life is none of my business, but given the fact that you are my friend, or at least used to be and are working quite closely with me, I have to ask - what were you and Julie exactly doing in the last 15 minutes?” Peter questioned before adding, “I trust you’ve been made aware of her… preferred ways to spend her breaks?”  
Sam laughed shakily at the way Peter phrased Julie’s favorite pastime at the office. Sam only ran a hand through his forehead, his sweating had eased slightly. He stepped forward and addressed the matter at hand, trying to subdue his laughter as much as he could. So far he was doing fairly well in that department.  
“I’ll have you know that woman is a pain in the arse, but no worries I’ve made her aware of the fact that I would not be engaging in any similar activities with her, nor with any other female in this office building.” Sam tried to be as vague as possible and skipped the part when he’d left the woman crying. Peter would most probably yell at him, after all, he’d always been a gentleman at heart and making a woman cry under no circumstances was proper behavior in his book.   
Peter sighed and looked at Sam curiously before he proceeded,” Pardon my interference and nosiness, but I believe at least last time I checked…”  
Sam’s eyes widened before he chuckled darkly, “God you still can’t say it…”  
It was Peter’s eyes that widened now before he whispered,”I thought you said you did not remember your high school years?”  
Sam deadpanned as he whirled around and not looking at Peter enquired, “Do you honestly expect me to forget how I got rejected by the one person I loved and trusted with my whole being?” He then faced Peter and his eyes were moist. Peter wished he move forward and brush the tears away, “Don’t bother, Pete…It’s all in the past but I will have you know that yes, I am still gay and I am planning on remaining that way for the rest of my life. Plus, this is not exactly something I get to choose nor control and be able to wake up one day and tell myself - hey, you know what, Samuel? Let’s not fuck guys anymore, let’s go after girls, and girls only!”

“Sam, you know I did not mean it like that.Plus, you did not even let me finish…” Peter tried to reason with Sam.   
“Oh really then how did you mean it exactly? Because after all, last time I checked Julie was a woman and you know better than anyone else what gets me going and it’s definitely not her attributes.” Sam quipped as he grabbed a napkin and brushed his forehead. He wished he could get away from this. He’d hoped Peter would’ve got over his slight homophobia. Apparently he had no problems with gays in general, he simply did not wish to associate with somebody who had fallen for him in such a way.   
Little did Sam know how wrong he had been then and how wrong he was now.   
“Sam, I’m sorry, truly am. I only wanted to warn you. I was looking out for you.” Peter said, his tone holding a dismal lilt to it.  
“Really? So insulting me and looking disgusted by my presence is what you call looking out for me?” Sam responded before he exited the office.   
He went back to his duties and during the next few days the conversations he and Peter had were strained to say the least. Julie had taken an extended vacation after her encounter with Sam and Sam was grateful for that. He was thinking of doing the same when Peter called him to his office once more on that fateful Friday evening.   
“What?” Sam asked as the doors closed.   
“You’re invited over for dinner. MJ’s orders.” Peter simply stated as he gave the envelope with the invitation to Sam and exited the room, leaving a bewildered Sam behind.   
At that moment as Sam read the golden cursive he could only ask, “What the actual fuck?”


	5. Underneath it all

Sam stepped from side to side nervously as he rang the doorbell to the quaint suburban house. He sighed as he took in the all too familiar neighborhood. They were not too far away from Sam’s previous home…if he could even call it that.

Sam shook his head to rid himself of the morbid memories that would undoubtedly flood his mind and disallow him from experiencing even bittersweet happiness from tonight’s gathering. He’d been informed he would be able to see some of his old childhood friends and if he had to be honest, it made Sam happy that they still cared enough about him to wish to catch up and spend time with him after all these years.

“Oh, Sam. You shouldn’t have.” MJ said as she grabbed the bottle of whine Sam had brought.

“It’s the least I could do,” Sam replied as she welcomed him inside and chuckled as she replied:

“Do tell - is Peter’s overt politeness rubbing off on you now that you guys spend so much time together?”

Sam backpedaled mentally and stopped frozen on the spot. Her tone was filled with so much ridicule and venomous insinuation. Sam was taken aback by the abrupt change in her demeanor and her knowing, scornful smirk. He gulped and thanked the heavens for the first time in a week that Peter showed up and greeted him.

Their handshake was quick and diplomatic-like - lacking absolutely all ounce of previous friendship and affection the two had held for the other.

“It is nice to see you in a different setting, Sam.” Peter murmured as he excused himself to go to the backyard, whilst MJ went into the kitchen.

Sam had come 30 minutes earlier and the others had yet to arrive. Given the current predicament, Sam decided to look around the house after he’d garnered the needed open invitation to do so. He’d rather avoid spending more alone time with MJ for the time being.

* * *

 

If Sam was not deluding himself, he would take a wild guess Peter and MJ could not stand each other and at the same time, MJ harbored some sort of strong distaste for Sam yet a part of her still valued him as an old childhood friend. It was rather difficult to depict in the utmost detail what the entire atmosphere in the house was, nor did have a good enough way with words to do so. Hence he settled on the one conclusion he’d reached the veracity of he was certain in - tonight was going to be filled with much-unneeded tension that was unavoidable for the most part and for the first time it was not going to be caused by him.

“Hey, little one.” Sam smiled as he greeted the small creature that smiled and giggled as she saw him. Mischievous blue eyes and vibrant red hair. Lexie truly did resemble her parents, but mostly her mother. Perhaps the ounces from Peter’s character would start to show as she grew older.

“Would you like to join us for dinner so that mom and dad will behave themselves?” He asked and she looked at him curiously as she grabbed his tie with her hands and started playing with it.

Sam chuckled and allowed the child a bit more time to explore all the contours of the fabric before she became bored with it and Sam as well and went back to her toys. Sam smiled as he ruffled her hair and exited the room. He checked the clock and sighed in frustration as he noticed there were 23 minutes left until dinner started and when most people would be arriving. Sam decided he would try and make amends with Peter first.

He made his way to the hallway and was about to open the door to the backyard when he noticed him. He was sitting hunched over, his shoulders sagging as he took another drag from his cigarette and then leaned back into his chair and blew the puffs of smoke into the air, contaminating it and himself even further. His morose expression made something inside Sam twinge in worry and pain. He hated seeing those blue eyes filled with anything but pure joy.

“Hey,” Sam said as he opened the door and made his way towards Peter.

“Hello,” Peter replied as he nodded towards the chair next to him, silently asking Sam to sit next to him. Naturally, Sam accepted the invitation.

“I didn’t know you smoked,” Sam stated as Peter blew another puff into the air opposite Sam’s direction.

“I didn’t know you would stoop so low as to hack your bosses’ enemies and aid them into making said enemies go into jail or bankruptcy at least, but here you are.” Sam looked flabbergasted and opened and closed his mouth as those blue storms stared into him. There was no accusation, only pure confusion and possibly disappointment and dare Sam to say it worry in the gaze.

“Why did you allow those horrid people to use you in such a way, Sam?”

“Let’s just a say I had to do some things to clean up after my father left us and protect my family.” Sam bluntly answered, making Peter gasp. The older of the two opened his mouth to press Sam with further questions, but Sam shushed him with a finger to his own mouth. Peter for some strange immediately closed his mouth as well. Sam smiled behind his finger and added, “Thank you for staying silent. I’m not proud of the things I did, but if it means I will be able to protect the ones I love..I would do it any day, any time, any place over and over again.”

Peter nodded as he thought about it. He would probably do the same.

“I do understand where you’re coming from, but that doesn’t mean I would just sit by and watch you go back to your old ways.”

“Trust me. I’m not that interesting anymore.” Sam spoke the truth and Peter believed him. The older man smiled as he took the last drag from his cigarette and threw it away after he’d extinguished the small remnant of flames on it.

“We should head back inside,” Peter said as Sam nodded and the two locked eyes.

“Is everything alright with you guys?” Sam jerked his head in the house’s direction, more precisely, to the kitchen window where MJ could be seen chatting amiably with none other than Ava as the two were chopping vegetables. The entire domesticity of the scene was sickening for Peter to watch yet it was wonderful for Sam who craved to have that in his life more than ever now.

“It used to be and will be one day.” Peter ambiguously answered making Sam frown, but before the younger even had a chance to ask Peter mirrored his previous actions, making Sam chuckle and nod.

* * *

 

“Sam, it is so good to see you again!” Ava said as she moved in to hug him, surprising Sam who smiled awkwardly and returned the embrace.

“Likewise.” He replied laconically as he looked around the room and nodded towards Danny and Luke. He could not help but eye the hand on Ava’s back questioningly and with a barely hidden smirk he concluded one other thing: it seemed Danny and Ava’s relationship had progressed over the years.

“I’ll help you set the table,” Peter said as he and MJ went to the cabinets to fish out some dishes. Sam wanted to offer his help as well but suddenly thought better of it, not wishing to be caught in the crossfire.

Soon the six of them were sitting on the roundtable, each either taking a drink and/or eating from the delicious food MJ had cooked. Peter was rather quiet for Sam’s liking, but the younger one did not make a move to engage him in the conversations, knowing he, too, would fail like everyone else before that.

“So Sam what do you do?” Ava suddenly asked, making Sam glare at her. She was well acquainted with his current occupation but seemed to wish to expose it to absolutely everyone. The reason for said assumed desire Sam had no idea of.

“I am Peter’s assistant,” Sam answered back before he dived back into cutting his chicken.

“How the hell did that happen?” Luke asked, making Peter chuckle and save Sam part of the embarrassment.

“Let’s just say it was a strange coincidence.”

“Weren’t you into computers and even working in the industry?” Danny asked, making Sam sweat nervously. The two had had rather difficult conversations in the part. At the end of the day, Danny was the CEO of Rand Industries - a leading business empire that did not take it too well when someone was caught snooping around their unreleased projects.

“I was,” Sam answered before he took a sip of his water. He’d needed to retrieve important information otherwise his sister would’ve paid the price and that was not something he’d willingly risk if there was even the smallest chance he could prevent it from happening. Sam felt the air leave his lungs and a lump form in his throat as Danny stared at him with those smoldering eyes that had yet to this day fully believe his lies. The truth though would remain hidden.

“Excuse me, I need to get some air.” Sam suddenly said and quickly exited the dining room.

He walked into the backyard and sat in one of the arm-chairs. He rocked his feet back and forth, feeling the nervous energy finally leaving him before he sighed and stilled completely. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply - in and out, in and out - and soon opened his eyes, feeling much calmer and less irritable.

* * *

 

“Sam, I am so sorry. That was uncalled for.” Ava said as she joined him on one of the empty arm-chairs. Sam sighed as he looked her in the eyes and asked:

“Mind telling me what you were trying to achieve there?”

Ava was taken aback by his sudden outburst before she glared at him and voiced her reason, making Sam’s suspicions horridly come to life.

“I want to know what happened with you, Sam. It is not only because of what you did to Danny.”

“I did nothing that was too damaging.”

“You almost stalled his entire company’s leading projects. He could’ve gone bankrupt. You sold him out!”

Sam did not look her in the eyes. He simply stared ahead. He knew that he’d almost made it happen, the keyword almost. He could’ve gone all the way if he wanted to, but luckily the information he’d gathered was just about enough to ease his blackmailer’s insatiable greed.

“I cannot change the past.” He answered as he locked eyes with her, making her gasp. His eyes were void of remorse and it was obvious to Ava this was sickening.

“Apologizing will not revert my actions either.”

“Then why did you do it? For fun does not cut it. Experimentation either. All of that which you told Danny is complete bull.” Ava responded before Sam sighed and smiled sadly.

“Ava, I know you love him. And I know you’re trying to ask the questions Danny for some odd reason does not wish to seek the answer to himself, but I’ve already told you guys everything there is to know. Why do you keep searching for something that isn’t there?”

Ava gulped down the small tears that were about to fall.

“Because we miss our friend. You are not the person you used to be.”

“You are not either. Neither of us is. You don’t see me going around digging for the skeletons in other people’s closets, now do you?” Sam quipped as he got up and entered the house.

* * *

 

He made his way to the rack that held everyone’s coats and grabbed his. He was about to exit when a hand covered the doorknob. Sam stilled, knowing very well to whom those pale long fingers and plain golden ring belonged.

“Leaving so soon?” Peter questioned as he grabbed Sam’s cheek, directing the boy’s attention to him.

“I cannot stay here,” Sam said as he tried to open the door, but Peter blocked it completely. Sam growled as he asked, “What?”

“I’m coming with you,” Peter said as he grabbed his coat and opened the door, motioning for Sam to walk out first.

Sam rolled his eyes at Peter’s unyielding stubbornness.

“Suit yourself.” Sam quipped, making Peter chuckle for some odd reason as he exited the house, Peter following him.

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the show or its characters. I hope you like this story. Please share your thoughts as I am trying something different.


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